Gifts for Mom: Breaking out of the Heart Shaped Box

On the day we often go about ways things to show our loved ones we care, there's a new twist to the plan – plan in some gifts for you, mom.

The gift of calm
Calm is a spirit that can exist even in chaos. But in order to maintain it for the long run, we have to have peace of heart and make space for getting things under control. Address the real issues in your life and make a conscious priority list of the things that make up your life. It will make decisiveness that much easier.

The gift of gratitude
Gratitude is one of those funny things that breed more of itself just in the being. Most life coaches touch on elements of gratitude in dealing with a new approach to life. One needs to be positive to get things done and deal with what's on her plate, and it is a lot easier if she is not taken up with what others have. Its fine to want it for yourself as long as you take that emotion and put it constructively into your plans. Whether it's a more flexible schedule, a career change, a longer maternity leave, or a vacation, find out how others managed it and move ahead, making the necessary efforts.

The gift of realistic expectations
We all know, based on people's past actions, what they are likely to do again. Do not be caught off guard waiting for people to meet your personal expectations. People will say rude things, be late, and forget something important to you. Don't let it control your life. Work their difficulties in if you have to, avoid, overlook or confront the ones you have a choice about. The important thing to remember is how you react is a choice. There is no such thing as "He or she makes me so mad!" You are choosing to respond in anger. Even if they have done something unthoughtful, you are responsible for the behavior you bring to the table.

The gift of pleasure
Don't wait for others to bring you gifts of pleasure. In giving to others you will find some of them. In caring for your family you will find more. Don't give with a hidden expectation of what you want others to do for you. Ask them to. Or do it yourself.

The gift of stolen time
Take time away from the biggest wasters out there, e-mail checking, long phone calls, and watching TV. Plug in something into the schedule that will really recharge you. Coffee by yourself, a rare date night, reading a magazine or book you haven't had time for, working out, or a long bubble bath with a glass of wine. You might decide to make room for it regularly.

The Gift of order
Order means that we won't misplace our keys as often, we won't buy things we already have, and we will find it easier to be on time. Incorporate something orderly and watch it pay off. A detailed family calendar, allowing more time for getting ready routines, simplifying the bedtime routines, or planning for family time for everyone to look forward to are all easy options. Even a simple thing like a quick inventory of the pantry can avoid unnecessary trips to the store all week.

The gift of beauty
Whether it's matching baskets in the bathroom cupboard or a bouquet of twigs from outside to accent your indoor silk flowers, stash a bit of beauty in every room. Before you do, fill a couple of garbage bags with extra stuff and put them in the trunk at night to drop off the next day at the local thrift store. Less clutter will make room to look at the beautiful stuff.

The gift of dreams
Sometimes we get so caught up in the running of our family's day to day lives that we forget to dream for what we want it to look like in the future. Making more money one day or having a dream position, living in a different neighborhood, or retiring early all take a bit of pre planning. Sketch out the path you have seen others take to them. Read up if you are truly unfamiliar. Then start your path.

The gift of time to one's self
Saying no is something the unpracticed feel is selfish. In truth, it is conserving energy for those priorities you've pre-plotted. Keeping family and career together takes time and effort. Don't let lesser things derail you, especially the things you'd rather not do but don't know how to get out of. Read a book on assertiveness and self esteem if you have trouble in this area.

The gift of romance
Make giving romance and getting it a priority. Tell your mate and your family too. Whether it's more communication of those loving feelings, or regular dates you make you feel like yourself again, a bit of heart shaped magic is what makes ordinary days special.

Think of yourself as worthy of gifts not just on this day of love and not just on the days you have spare cash lying around. Incorporate elements of the gifts into your everyday and watch each one get a little lovelier.